Friday, December 18, 2015

Stuff Happens . . .

Why does stuff happen the way it does?  I ask myself this question quite often.  I never give myself a good answer.

Stuff just happens. 

Even so, I'm one of those people.  ??  You know, the ones who think that everything happens for a reason.  The ones you'd like to occasionally slap because they are so relentlessly cheerful.  I possess  " . . . that Irish trait of being able to happily keep contradictory beliefs going . . . " (W. Scott Simmons).

Yup, that's me. 

I truly do believe, deep down in my heart that things are not altogether random on this planet - that everything happens for a reason - that we are all in each other's paths for a reason.  That's why, when unexpected stuff happens, I work hard to make some sense of it - to see if I can figure out what I'm supposed to learn from every situation, both good, and not so good.  It's a hard concept sometimes, because sometimes the lesson was not for you - you were the lesson for someone else.  And sometimes you never find out what you were supposed to learn.

Our new choir director resigned last night - or rather, told us about it last night.  Something about fundamental differences.  I can respect that.  You have to follow your heart and what you believe.  I've done it myself.  In Junior High School, after going through confirmation class at a local church where we were living at the time, I told my mom that I didn't want to be confirmed in that church - the kids were really really mean (I cannot even begin to tell you . . . ) and it just wasn't right.  She honored my wish.  So I get the thing about fundamental differences. But since I belong to what I think is a very open and respectful denomination, I'm struggling to make sense of this.  What differences?  Why?  Why now?  Christmas Eve will be the last time we all sing together.   For a church in transition with only an interim minister, this is a blow.  At least it seems that way to me - but I'm not in charge so I don't really know.  I'm sad.  And confused.  And I wonder what's going to happen next - or if anything at all is going to happen next. 

It has occurred to me that maybe we won't find a new minister.  It seems to be taking a very long time.  I thought that with the choir being able to sing with a new director this year that that would be a very positive thing.  Maybe I was wrong.  I keep hoping for the best - happily juggling those contradictory belief balls with aplomb.  Maybe I'm wrong.  I've considered looking for a new church home, but my church life (wherever it's been lived) has been spent in a church in my community.  You attend in your neighborhood or local community.  Going somewhere far is a foreign concept to me.  And yet it seems to be what I might be considering.  I really wish I could make some sense of this.  But at the moment, I can't.  Obviously there are things that I don't know - and may never know.  What I do know, is that "the way it's always been" is in the wind, which means that change is in the air. 

What change that may be is still a mystery, and I have no fricking idea what I'm supposed to learn from this situation.


Anonymous said...

Ah, yes, the mysteries of life! I, too, believe that things happen for a reason. I have learned a lot from situations that have happened to me. Sometimes life can be a hard taskmaster. And sometimes the answer evades us. Sometimes it takes a while for the reason to make itself known. IF the lesson is for us, it will be made known. It will come to you when you least expect it. That is an "Aha!" moment.

And then again, sometimes we just have to put that experience in a box and put it up on the shelf. It may take a bit longer to understand the whys and wherefores as to what happened. I have one of those. I don't know why it happened. It shouldn't have happened. And as much as I try to forget it, there are reminders around me that bring it back in front of me to be dealt with. But for the life of me it doesn't make any sense. Sometimes I think the universe is playing a game with me.

I hope your resolution appears.

Janice H.

Michelle said...

Someone shared a poster on Facebook that resonates with me so much that I am going to print it off and hang it up. It says, "One day she finally grasped that unexpected things were always going to happen in life. And with that she realized the only control she had was how she chose to handle them. So she made the decision to survive using courage, humor and grace. She was the queen of her own life and the choice was hers." I, too, believe everything happens for a reason, although I believe that reason almost invariably is to help me grow to be more like Christ – in love, in patience, in service, in grace, and in total rejection of evil. Obviously, He's still working on me! ;-)